That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
