Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
