i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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