is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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