Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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