Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
