I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize