Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
