so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
