I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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