You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
