This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
