went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
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