So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
What a dumb baby whore.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
