covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
