you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
