please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
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all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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