try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Randomize
