That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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