SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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