O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize