Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize