guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
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