just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
