hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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