I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
