a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
