That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
