We're like a lot better than the average bears
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?