I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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