Who did Billy Mays play for?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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