Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Randomize