i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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