Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.