Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
My liver just had a heart attack.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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