i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Lo siento on account of my penis...
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.