He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
