i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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