Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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