So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
