you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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