Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
