It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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