I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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