i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
