You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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