It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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