Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
