i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
