some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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